Thursday, July 15, 2010

Almost heaven, but weirder

Ok, West Virginia. You made that John Denver song burn into my brain FOREVER.

This has to be the weirdest state we passed through on our journey. The disparity between the beautiful mountains and the harsh, belching industrial areas gave my eyeballs whiplash. And then there was the giggling. Over and over West Virginia provided a dose of crazy for my delight. But we'll get to that in a minute. First the obligatory scenic shots.

Yes, I know it looks like Virginia. You're just gonna have to believe me.

Then there was the crazy. Oh dear Lawdy, the crazy runs rampant in these parts. Here's my favorite shots of "What the Hell? Did I really just see that?".

Isn't this the best house you've ever seen? The subtle use of color. The comfort of the repeating pattern. The coordinating shed. It's a masterpiece. Better Homes and Gardens needs to hustle their asses out here and talk to these people before this trend catches on. For the record, that is not paint. It's every color of siding ever made and a few that should have never been made. It's like a giant box of crayolas that you live in. Fabulous!

Now this is fine art, folks. Giant spotted dinosaur being ridden by a cave woman mannequin carrying a compound bow. But really, it's the ivy around the dinosaur's neck that really ties the whole thing together.

Now, we need to talk about this next shot. This is quite possibly the best picture I have ever taken. And if this was the only thing I had witnessed all week, the trip would have totally been worth it. This image now lives in the happy place in my brain, so that I can go there when I need some giggle time.

DeHart's Bible and Tire. Oh, where do I begin? The Man, who was busy driving and not killing us, even did a double take and turned his head to say, "Didja get that? Please tell me you got that!".

Mr.(or Ms.) DeHart, I commend you for your resourcefulness. Now you can save our souls and our cars at the same time.

West Virgina, I love you, like that weird guy in high school that always made you laugh, but still smelled kinda funny. Yeah, like that.

Total Mileage: 1,592 miles
Times I almost peed my pants because The Man wouldn't stop: 3
Rainstorms waited out under an awning at a gas station: 1
Days left until I am home doing laundry and weeping: 1


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